Just sometimes I feel like I live in between reality and what I wish my reality was. Which can be very unfortunate when you're at a party trying to enjoy yourself but you just can' because yo just feel miserable. When a person is alone their imagination can take over, they can pretend tat their lie is better than it actually is, but wen they are suddenly in public they are harshly pulled out of this fantasy and are given and very painful reality check: your life is miserable, you aren't happy, none of these people like you very much, everyone is staring at you wondering why you're here. And, to be completely honest, that kind of hurts. But it gets easier with tie right? Isn't that what everyone says? Well I'm going to be very blunt here, no it does not get easier with time, you can't just sit around waiting for something wonderful to happen to make you feel better. God is on your side and will help you, but you have to work too, he can't do all the work for you. And even though it is REALLY difficult sometimes...that is just what you have to do. You have to go out and change things, because nothing is going to change unless you go out there and do something DIFFERENT. That's the key here, doing something different, changing something in your life to make it a little bit better. In my case that was staying away from certain people, because once I started to go back to them I felt miserable again, so I've got to change that. I've got to be happy again. Because being depressed...is over rated. And I'm done dealing with it.
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